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The Glass Cannon Podcast
Season 1
Episode 48

Honk If You're Thorny

April 26, 2016

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The Glass Cannon Podcast - S1 - E48

Our heroes step through the stone portal into the mysteriously lush and beautiful Vault of Thorns, but they soon find its vines and sweet smelling blossoms conceal an insidious evil!

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The Glass Cannon Podcast: Season 1 - 98 Episode s

1x1 - Introducing Tom Exposition
June 16, 2015
A group of unlikely heroes meet at a coming of age suicide festival and decide to share a hotel room as most strangers who meet for the first time often do.
1x2 - O Captain! My (Dead) Captain!
June 16, 2015
The reluctant heroes are tasked with investigating the suspicious death of a popular patrol captain and ass play unexpectedly enters the picture.
1x3 - The Wall of Wolfs Street
June 16, 2015
New suspicions are raised, drunk racists are questioned and the compatriots get their first taste of combat as they throw down in the street against a pack of gross nasty ass wolves!
1x4 - The Neutral Evil Milk Hotel
June 23, 2015
The Ramblehouse loses a whole star from their Yelp review as the party's night turns deadly and the investigation shifts to a sexy blacksmith and a former fiancee!
1x5 - Sixth Sense Motive
June 30, 2015
The crew don't see dead people, but they do use their keen powers of insight to track down a spirit-haunted seer who may be the key to the whole investigation!
1x6 - Pee-wee's Plague House
July 7, 2015
For the first time, the party ventures forth from the relative safety of the walls of Trunau and plunges headlong into the haunted ruin that is the Plague House!
1x7 - Humans, Centipede
July 14, 2015
Our heroes disturb some unexpected residents of the Plague House and face off against their creepiest enemies yet!
1x8 - The Rat Stuff
July 21, 2015
Defying roleplaying game convention, our low-level party combats a stairway full of giant rats! And as they descend into the darkened basement of the Plague House, Barron matches wits with a bear trap and the crew comes face to face with a truly savage foe!
1x9 - Gleaming the Cube
July 28, 2015
With the identity of a foe revealed, the group descends deeper into the cellar of the Plague House - where they stumble upon a deadly invisible enemy!
1x10 - Shut Up, Kid!
August 4, 2015
Tensions run high as the evil below the Plague House is revealed, the players nearly mutiny when they believe Troy is intentionally trying to kill all of the characters and the heroes deeply regret allowing themselves to be goaded into foolhardiness by some stupid kid!
1x11 - Four Warnings and a Funeral
August 11, 2015
Victory! Finally defeated, the shadowy Daktani reveals a sinister plan that may threaten all of Trunau! The party returns to deliver these dire tidings to the town leaders, even as preparations are made to lay Patrol Captain Rodrik Grath to rest.
1x12 - The Killing Choke
August 18, 2015
As Skreed's trap is sprung, a bigoted priest takes advantage of the chaos by staging a lynching, and the heroes brave smoke and flame in a collapsing building to rescue an old friend.
1x13 - Drunkards & Flagons
August 25, 2015
As the battle rages, the companions face off against inebriated bandits pillaging a local tavern! Will they triumph in time to save a little girl from a fate worse than death? WARNING: This particular episode deals with dark and mature themes. As we were discovering the voice of the show early on, our improvisation led us down paths exploring the horrific nature of orc society. Please be assured that we course corrected to stray away from these themes as the podcast continued.
1x14 - Weekend at Carl's
September 1, 2015
One horrible crime averted, the group turns their attention to thwarting another. But will Lorc survive a brutal self-inflicted wound and help save an innocent family? WARNING: This particular episode deals with dark and mature themes.
1x15 - The Belkzen Hostility Orc-hestra
September 8, 2015
The beat goes on as the companions assault a tower filled with orcs, rockin and rollin' to the magical drums of an enemy skald!
1x16 - The Killing Choke Part II - Choker's Wild
September 15, 2015
Lorc and company race to find his adopted son and a long sought after piece of the puzzle comes to light. But first, they must survive a bout with a lung-searing cloud of alchemical smoke and the savage beastmistress within!
1x17 - J'son Rise, J'son Set
September 22, 2015
As the heroes mourn a devastating loss, revenge opens the door to a bloodbath. Meanwhile, a chance encounter with a cryptic stranger brings disturbing news from the front, and an old friend returns just in the nick of time!
1x18 - Frum Here, Too Infirm Is He
September 29, 2015
The companions find their spirits bolstered by the return of perpetually pickled Patrol Sergeant Omast Frum. But they'll need all the help they can get against wave after wave of bloodthirsty orcs storming the city gates of Trunau!
1x19 - Fortune Favors the Boulder
October 6, 2015
A deadly trap is sprung as our heroes unleash hell on their orcish foes. The brutal battle for the city gates rages on!
1x20 - We're Off to Feed the Lizard
October 13, 2015
Troy makes a shocking admission and a giant monitor lizard tries to make a meal out of Barron, as the battle at the gates of Trunau comes to an explosive conclusion!
1x21 - Lorc Out Below
October 20, 2015
With the final beacon lit, the party turns their attentions outside the walls to an unseen siege engine lobbing fiery death upon Trunau!
1x22 - Blame It On the Chain
October 27, 2015
It's a showdown on the banks of the Hopespring, as a gigantic foe slogs relentlessly through the water towards our desperate and exhausted heroes in our longest episode yet!
1x23 - Cavern on the Green
November 3, 2015
After a long delayed rest, our heroes track their unknown quarry into the mouth of an ancient cave. What terrors will they encounter beneath Bloodmarch Hill??
1x24 - No Egrets
November 10, 2015
Delving deeper into the caverns beneath Bloodmarch Hill, the party encounters a very different kind of danger. Will the pursuit of their quarry continue, or will they succumb to a fate worse than death?
1x25 - Assassin Skreed
November 17, 2015
The heroes have tracked the merciless Skreed down to a mysterious cavern deep below Bloodmarch Hill. But the villain has allies at his side in the dark.
1x26 - Assassin Skreed 2
November 24, 2015
The battle concludes as the party draws upon all their might in an attempt to cast down their adversary. But will they even stand a chance against this seemingly invincible foe?
1x27 - Skreed Between the Lines
December 1, 2015
With the mastermind behind the Trunau attacks finally subdued, the party gets their chance to pry what clues they can of the larger plot. But a threat still lurks in the darkness that could make this ancient underground tomb our heroes' final resting place as well!
1x28 - Cave of Mutilation
December 8, 2015
With a battered and bound Skreed in tow, the adventurers seek a way out of the caverns beneath Bloodmarch Hill. But will curiosity get the better of them as they stumble into even greater danger?
1x29 - Ivory Hall & Oates
December 15, 2015
The Glass Cannon boys take a moment to reflect on the events of Book One of the Giantslayer campaign (and drop a little knowledge on the world of Golarion) before launching into the exciting events of Book Two!
1x30 - Nobody Expects the Thomas Exposition!
December 22, 2015
An old friend returns to help the heroes confront ghosts from the past, even as Trunau's Council of Defenders tasks them with their greatest quest yet!
1x31 - A River Puns Through It
December 29, 2015
Avast ye mateys! The party sets sail aboard the Chelish Devil. Their destination? Adventure! Will these landlubbers take to boating like a duck to water or will they go overboard when they smell something...fishy?
1x32 - Stop, Croc and Roll
January 5, 2016
A suspicious accident sends Lorc plunging from the deck into the icy waters below as deadly denizens of the river race to tear him limb from limb. Meanwhile his companions call on allies old and new to try and save their friend from a watery grave!
1x33 - A Dick in the Boat
January 12, 2016
After narrowly surviving what appears to be a deliberate attempt on his life, Lorc and the rest of the party put on their detective hats as they attempt to uncover the identity of the saboteur aboard the Chelish Devil!
1x34 - Hate the Drake!
January 19, 2016
When a trio of river monsters descends on the crew, pandemonium ensues as a battle breaks out on the upper deck! But it's a race against time when the largest of these winged river denizens absconds with some precious cargo.
1x35 - Drake-ing Bad
January 26, 2016
Having tracked the Alpha Drake to its filthy riverside lair, the party embarks on a desperate attempt to rescue Gormlaith's new best friend, Reggie the war horse. But perhaps an even greater danger awaits them back on board.
1x36 - Gorilla Warfare
February 2, 2016
A living nightmare unfolds below deck as the heroes face off against the simian Bakkara, the horror from the Mwangi Expanse!
1x37 - The No Pants Flute Dance
February 9, 2016
Gormlaith plays a desperate gambit in order to protect Lorc in his investigation of the ship's secret hatch!
1x38 - Taug of War
February 16, 2016
With a suspect in custody, the party gets permission to interrogate Taug, the half-orc boatman. Will the truth continue to elude them or will they finally uncover the traitor on board the Chelish Devil?
1x39 - The Immolation Game
February 23, 2016
With barely a moment to recover from their fight with the dire wolves, the heroes rush into the waystation to investigate the imperiled screams of an unknown woman.
1x40 - Down the Hatch
March 1, 2016
The "Trunau Four" receive some vital new information from the recently rescued Knight of Ozem and upon their return to the keelboat, they finally seize upon a long awaited opportunity to investigate the mysterious secret hatch!
1x41 - Bilge of Spies
March 8, 2016
The battle beneath the decks of the Chelish Devil reaches a bloody conclusion and the identity of the stowaway is finally revealed. But was she acting alone? And does an even greater threat await our heroes topside?
1x42 - For He's a Jolly Good Merrow
March 15, 2016
The confrontation with Gashnakh over his apparent treachery is rudely interrupted by an aquatic ogre attack!
1x43 - Frankly My Dear, I Just Blew a Dam
March 22, 2016
The heroes turn their attention to the obstacle blocking their path, secure in the knowledge that the traitor has been silenced. But has the danger on board truly passed?
1x44 - Rumble Singeskin
March 29, 2016
Just as the marker stone fades into view on the misty banks of the River Esk, the Chelish Devil is ambushed by a boarding party of bloodthirsty orcs!
1x45 - The Marshin' Chronicles
April 5, 2016
The heroes take their first tentative steps into Ghostlight Marsh as they begin their search for the Vault of Thorns. Their slog through the swamp quickly turns perilous as they face a scourge the likes of which they've never seen!
1x46 - Marsh Madness
April 12, 2016
Flush with confidence after their battle with the hydra, the companions stumble upon one of the madder denizens of Ghostlight Marsh.
1x47 - Circle Jerks
April 19, 2016
Guided by the Ghostlight Lantern, the adventurers finally discover the stone circle that marks the gateway to the Vault of Thorns. But upon arriving at this ancient place, they soon discover that they're not alone.
1x48 - Honk If You're Thorny
April 26, 2016
Our heroes step through the stone portal into the mysteriously lush and beautiful Vault of Thorns, but they soon find its vines and sweet smelling blossoms conceal an insidious evil!
1x49 - Gentlemen Prefer Blinds
May 3, 2016
On the heels of the blindingly magnificent battle on the bridge, the heroes encounter a mysterious and ancient denizen of the Vault.
1x50 - Flies, You Fools!
May 10, 2016
As we celebrate our 50th episode, Barron's fate is up in the air. The heroes battle an oversized dragonfly a hundred feet above a maggoty midden heap!
1x51 - The Bear and the Maiden Fair
May 17, 2016
With scant time to come to terms with recent events, the group encounters a new furry friend and a strange creature lodged in an ancient tree.
1x52 - Tendril Mercies
May 24, 2016
Companions old and new engage in a desperate struggle with a ridiculous tentacled foe in an effort to reclaim Barron's lost fishing pole/dignity!
1x53 - Doom and Bloom
May 31, 2016
Our heroes work their way ever deeper into the Vault of Thorns. As their search for a cache of druidic items continues, they find that the long lost masters of this place have a few surprises left in store.
1x54 - Mulch Ado About Nothing
June 7, 2016
The battle weary heroes spy what must be their final goal, a swollen wooden chest from across a compost-strewn chamber. As an aura of blight begins to permeate the room, the source of all this decay and rot makes its thorny presence known.
1x55 - Ewigga, Please!
June 14, 2016
Battered and spent from their ruthless battle with the Brambleblight, the heroes try to muster what little strength they have left to fight tooth and nail against an elusive and disturbingly powerful traitor in their very midst!
1x56 - Elementally, Mud Dear Watson
June 21, 2016
With the Vault of Thorns behind them, the adventurers begin their trek back to the Chelish Devil. Little do they know, however, that Ghostlight Marsh has one last surprise in store for them.
1x57 - Pyre When Ready
June 28, 2016
The Party returns to the keelboat to share sad tidings with the waiting crew and deliver a fitting tribute to fallen comrades. Then it's back up the Esk River before finally setting out on foot towards Redlake Fort.
1x58 - How Della Got Her Groove Back
July 5, 2016
With Lorc nowhere to be seen, a hill giant and his band of murderous orcs spring a deadly trap on our unsuspecting heroes!
1x59 - Grate Expectations
July 12, 2016
After some reconnaissance, the party attempts to infiltrate Redlake Fort by way of its sewer. Surely nothing bad could happen in a centuries old sewer, right?!
1x60 - Silence of the BLAMs
July 19, 2016
Our heroes ascend a watchtower within the fort to confront the malformed sentries atop it. Will they be able to defeat their foes though without Barron's magic hand-banger alerting the whole compound?
1x61 - Mist Connections
July 26, 2016
A visit to the tent of a mysterious oracle unveils long-held secrets of the past, present and future.
1x62 - General Admission
August 2, 2016
On the advice of the half-orc oracle Droja, the heroes lay down their weapons and attempt to negotiate a deal with her orc tormenter General Kargukk!
1x63 - Bullets Ogre Broadway
August 9, 2016
The adventurers ambush a gang of their vilest, most despicable enemies yet, but will they be able to vanquish these giant foes without raising the suspicions of the rest of the fort?!
1x64 - Blix is For Kids
August 16, 2016
In a chapel sacred to Gelabrous' goddess Desna, the crew confront a long-dead spirit before having to make a vital decision on which way to continue deeper into the fort.
1x65 - Isn't It Romanticore
August 23, 2016
The crew encounter a pair of magical beasts imprisoned and begging for help, but with more secrets of Redlake Fort seemingly just out of reach, can these abused creatures be trusted?
1x66 - The Wedding Slashers
August 30, 2016
Drawn by the sounds of muffled sobs, the adventurers finally confront the alleged mastermind behind the attack on Trunau Grenseldek!
1x67 - The Wedding Slashers 2: Married to the Sob
September 6, 2016
Troy reveals the results on the index card as the battle with Grenseldek reaches its thrilling conclusion!
1x68 - Summon-Where Ogre the Pain-Bow
September 13, 2016
With the threat of Grenseldek out of the way, our heroes turn their attention to an incestuous band of ogres in the midst of a horrifying necromantic ritual!
1x69 - Duel Intentions
September 20, 2016
With Grenseldek and Pappy Gutterunch vanquished, the fate of Redlake Fort is up in the air as Lorc confronts General Kargukk in a battle to the death!
1x70 - Gar and Away
September 27, 2016
With the party split and all lives hanging in the balance, the final battle for Redlake Fort reaches its dramatic conclusion!
1x71 - That Was Then, This is Trunau
October 4, 2016
Battle-worn and shrouded in despair, the heroes return to Trunau. A meeting with the Council of Defenders awaits as the party tries to decide how to move forward.
1x72 - Half-Orc Will Travel
October 11, 2016
Reeling from the loss of one companion, the party must contend with the disappearance of another.
1x73 - Trees Company
October 18, 2016
As summer turns to fall our heroes set forth on the next stage of their quest in search of the tomb of famed giant-killer Nargrym Steelhand.
1x74 - Working the Shaft
October 25, 2016
The party enters a mysterious structure and descends web-choked stairs deep into the waiting darkness.
1x75 - A Tomb with a View
November 1, 2016
With the help of the dwarves, the heroes have breached the final resting place of Nargrym Steelhand. While in awe of the majesty of sepulcher, they soon discover that not all is what it should be in the tomb of the famed Giantslayer.
1x76 - Spored to Death
November 8, 2016
It's a race against time as the companions battle a poisonous cloud of spores and Nargrym's betrayer!
1x77 - Spear and Loathing in Lost Places
November 15, 2016
The final showdown with Lokmorr the Betrayer reaches its deadly conclusion!
1x78 - Night at the Mausoleum
November 22, 2016
After enduring a devastating loss at the hands of Lokmorr the Betrayer, the heroes attempt to recover their strength in the depths of the tomb.
1x79 - Ewigga, Please! Part 2 Witches Be Crazy
November 29, 2016
An old nemesis returns to terrorize the party once again!
1x80 - Mighty Orphan Power Rangers
December 6, 2016
Drawn by the cries of a frightened infant, the adventurers come across the shattered remains of a farmhouse but they are not alone!
1x81 - The Hills Have Eye
December 13, 2016
Rescued babe in tow, the crew arrive at the prospecting town of Shinnerman's Fortune only to find an all too familiar scene.
1x82 - Ogre My Dead Body
December 20, 2016
The heroes get the jump on a band of bloodthirsty ogres and attempt to free their terrified captives!
1x83 - Look Who's Stalking
December 27, 2016
Umlo leads the party toward the sounds of his deceased sister's voice as the journey deeper into Minderhal's Valley continues.
1x84 - Heads 'Em Off at the Pass
January 3, 2017
The party attempts a parlay with the quarrelling voices they hear up ahead on the winding path through Minderhal's Valley.
1x85 - Let Them Eat Drake
January 10, 2017
The party comes to a crossroads as the battle with the rift drake concludes.
1x86 - Interview with the Campfire
January 17, 2017
Following an interrogation of their soused captive Ved, the party must make an important decision on which way to go next.
1x87 - How Do You Like This Chapel?
January 24, 2017
After a triumphant victory against Gristlecrack and her band of trolls, the party forges ahead flush with new powers.
1x88 - Altared States
January 31, 2017
As they attempt to discover the significance of an ancient chapel dedicated to a fire giant god deep within Minderhal's Valley, an explosion rocks the party.
1x89 - Bottle of Red, Bottle of Wight
February 7, 2017
It's the Day of the Inheritor! As Sir Will celebrates all things Iomedae, he has some things to get off his chest to Della. Meanwhile, a foreboding sign at another crossroads may force the party to change course.
1x90 - Big Willy Style
February 14, 2017
As the party recovers after a draining battle with Marsh Giant Wights, another decision on which way to go next leads to a foreboding dead end.
1x91 - The Horn Identity
February 21, 2017
While conducting a thorough examination of the spire drake's treasure hoard, the party also gleans some intriguing information with regards to the cave's original occupant. Then, after a series of dead ends, they come upon a curious network of tunnels seemingly abandoned for centuries.
1x92 - Dead Ender's Game
February 28, 2017
As Barron comes face to face with potential connections to his unknown past, the party encounters a much more powerful version of an old foe times three!
1x93 - Service with a Smilodon
March 7, 2017
With a massive cathedral and countless giant encampments looming in the distance, the party must tangle with a pair of savage prehistoric beasts and their oversized handlers.
1x94 - Sneaky Blinders
March 14, 2017
Having vanquished the guardians at the gate, the party faces crucial decisions on how they can possibly proceed with hundreds upon hundreds of giants between them and the cathedral.
1x95 - Tent of a Woman
March 21, 2017
Deep behind enemy lines, the party encounters a strange creature in her tent outside the cathedral.
1x96 - Tent of a Woman 2: Payback's a Witch
March 28, 2017
After a ferocious near-deadly battle, the mysterious, self-proclaimed Oculus rises and all hell breaks loose mere steps away from the Cathedral!
1x97 - Dream Reavers
April 4, 2017
As infighting threatens to destroy the party from within, they face the even greater challenge of infiltrating the cathedral.
1x98 - Ettin Down to Business
April 11, 2017
After successfully sneaking into the cathedral, the party faces a terrible threat as more mysteries begin to unfold.

The Glass Cannon Podcast: All seasons

S0: Specials
7 Episode s
S1: Season 1 - Giantslayer
334 Episode s
S2: Season 2 - Gatewalkers
16 Episode s

1x1 - Introducing Tom Exposition

1x2 - O Captain! My (Dead) Captain!

1x3 - The Wall of Wolfs Street

1x4 - The Neutral Evil Milk Hotel

1x5 - Sixth Sense Motive

1x6 - Pee-wee's Plague House

1x7 - Humans, Centipede

1x8 - The Rat Stuff

1x9 - Gleaming the Cube

1x10 - Shut Up, Kid!

1x11 - Four Warnings and a Funeral

1x12 - The Killing Choke

1x13 - Drunkards & Flagons

1x14 - Weekend at Carl's

1x15 - The Belkzen Hostility Orc-hestra

1x16 - The Killing Choke Part II - Choker's Wild

1x17 - J'son Rise, J'son Set

1x18 - Frum Here, Too Infirm Is He

1x19 - Fortune Favors the Boulder

1x20 - We're Off to Feed the Lizard

1x21 - Lorc Out Below

1x22 - Blame It On the Chain

1x23 - Cavern on the Green

1x24 - No Egrets

1x25 - Assassin Skreed

1x26 - Assassin Skreed 2

1x27 - Skreed Between the Lines

1x28 - Cave of Mutilation

1x29 - Ivory Hall & Oates

1x30 - Nobody Expects the Thomas Exposition!

1x31 - A River Puns Through It

1x32 - Stop, Croc and Roll

1x33 - A Dick in the Boat

1x34 - Hate the Drake!

1x35 - Drake-ing Bad

1x36 - Gorilla Warfare

1x37 - The No Pants Flute Dance

1x38 - Taug of War

1x39 - The Immolation Game

1x40 - Down the Hatch

1x41 - Bilge of Spies

1x42 - For He's a Jolly Good Merrow

1x43 - Frankly My Dear, I Just Blew a Dam

1x44 - Rumble Singeskin

1x45 - The Marshin' Chronicles

1x46 - Marsh Madness

1x47 - Circle Jerks

1x48 - Honk If You're Thorny

1x49 - Gentlemen Prefer Blinds

1x50 - Flies, You Fools!

1x51 - The Bear and the Maiden Fair

1x52 - Tendril Mercies

1x53 - Doom and Bloom

1x54 - Mulch Ado About Nothing

1x55 - Ewigga, Please!

1x56 - Elementally, Mud Dear Watson

1x57 - Pyre When Ready

1x58 - How Della Got Her Groove Back

1x59 - Grate Expectations

1x60 - Silence of the BLAMs

1x61 - Mist Connections

1x62 - General Admission

1x63 - Bullets Ogre Broadway

1x64 - Blix is For Kids

1x65 - Isn't It Romanticore

1x66 - The Wedding Slashers

1x67 - The Wedding Slashers 2: Married to the Sob

1x68 - Summon-Where Ogre the Pain-Bow

1x69 - Duel Intentions

1x70 - Gar and Away

1x71 - That Was Then, This is Trunau

1x72 - Half-Orc Will Travel

1x73 - Trees Company

1x74 - Working the Shaft

1x75 - A Tomb with a View

1x76 - Spored to Death

1x77 - Spear and Loathing in Lost Places

1x78 - Night at the Mausoleum

1x79 - Ewigga, Please! Part 2 Witches Be Crazy

1x80 - Mighty Orphan Power Rangers