1x1 - This Means War

February 1, 2006

Ethan tries to lure Lucas away from the Xbox. The episode begins with Ethan playing a PSP at his store. A customer asks if he can play Halo on his PS2 and Ethan ignores him, eventually mocking the man as he persists to ask if xbox games will work on the PS2. The customer gets mad and leaves the store, vowing never to return. The theme song plays. Ethan goes home having used his paycheck to buy more video games and Lucas is using the Xbox. Lucas encourages Ethan to do something else for a change (read a book or ride a bike, for instance) and Ethan leaves, angry. Ethan instead decides to lure Lucas away from the Xbox through a variety of tactics such as a pretend suicide and attempted homicide, and Lucas fights back by gluing Ethan's hand to a door and distracting with pictures that the audience assumes are of naked women. In the end, a cooking knife ends up embedded in the controller and they resolve to play a co-op. Lilah comes in and asks if she can play Halo.

1x2 - Long Day

March 1, 2006

Ethan asks Zeke to call in to work and fake a family tragedy to get Ethan out of work. Ethan and Zeke are playing a video game which seems to be Fight Night: Round 3 from the sounds. Barry calls Ethan to remind him that he is supposed to be working, and after Ethan tries (and fails) to pretend that he is someone else, convinces Ethan to come in to work. Ethan asks Zeke to call in to work and fake a family tragedy to get Ethan out. The theme song plays. At the store, Ethan is told to manage the store while Barry does some paperwork in the back room. Ethan manages to ignore a long line of customers, assault a customer looking for an N-Gage, and scare a woman into a heart attack while Zeke wastes time at home rather than call to get Ethan out of work. When the store closes, Ethan goes home and gets angry with Zeke for forgetting to call in and decides to destroy him at Fight Night. Ethan loses the match, curses

1x3 - Evolution

April 1, 2006

Ethan tries to prove that robots aren't better than humans. Cut to a scene of Everquest 2, where Ethan's character kills a 'monster' and reaches Level 30 after three weeks. Ethan asks Lucas who is better; him or Zeke. Lucas says Zeke is better, only because he doesn't want to be turned into something resembling a battery when the robots 'take over the planet'.

1x4 - Culinary Craft

April 30, 2006

Ethan tries to cook dinner for a friend of Lilah's. Lucas makes fun of Lilah for deciding to marry Ethan. Lucas also tells Lilah that Ethan can't cook to save his life. Lilah disagrees. Lucas then unplugs the phone and does not cook dinner. Ethan subsequently enters a state of confused panic as the fridge is not preparing the food for him and the "telephone people" aren't answering his pleas for sustenance. Lilah decides to invite a friend over from work to come for dinner and tells Ethan that they should both cook. Ethan, having only cooked once in his life before (which ended in the haunting of the Swedish Chef), ends up helping out. During the cooking process we see that Ethan, in fact, cannot cook. Lucas cleans him up with the fire extinguisher on multiple occasions. Finally the meal is done and Lilah's friend comes over. Ethan goes to bring the meal to the table but is haunted again by the Swedish Chef and throws the food at the apparition to fend it off, ruining the dinner.

1x5 - Brain Scatter

June 1, 2006

A series of unrelated sketches featuring minor Ctrl+Alt+Del characters. 'Player 2' is chased and then killed in a fantasy game, while standing in front of 'Player 1's character shouting "Heal me" over and over, while Player 1 does nothing'. In the next scene, a pair of male PSPs are sitting at a table, when a female DS walks past holding a tray of burgers, to which the PSPs reply 'Fat-ass!'.

1x6 - Going Primal (1)

July 1, 2006

Ethan becomes upset and frustrated over the lack of video games during a power outage. Lucas tries to entertain him with a game of chess, but Ethan compares it to a video game, and leaves because he can't find the "options menu". Ethan tries using Zeke and having him describe what's going on instead of using a TV output, but Zeke has no battery power left. A clip of Ethan's mind exploding is then shown, and you then see Lucas go to the fridge, and Ethan is seen in tribal clothing, with a PlayStation Button layout painted on his face stopping him, saying the food box has been claimed for the tribe of the first controller. To be continued...

1x7 - Going Primal (2)

July 31, 2006

Ethan believes at the end of the world has come after the power outage. Lucas ignores him and tries to get ice cream out of the fridge before it melts. Ethan sneaks up and grabs Lilah from behind threatening her with, as Lucas puts it, "A blunt object". A fight ensues with a classic Star Trek alien battle music being played in the background.

1x8 - Last Copy

September 1, 2006

Ethan tries to take a copy of Lego Star Wars II from a person who got it before he could. Ethan is of course discovered and is taken captive by the man. Ethan eventually draws the line when the man attempts to force him play Dance Dance Revolution (DDR) with him. About five seconds into the game Ethan proclaims "This game sucks!".

1x9 - On the BattleField

October 1, 2006

A new soldier's experience with Battlefield 2142. The soldier lands in a pod, and attempts to get into a vehicle, but another soldier gets in first and drives off. Next, we see the soldier attempting to shoot an enemy soldier, but all of his bullets miss. He then attempts to throw the gun at the enemy, while he is walking towards him. The new soldier grabs his knife and kills himself.

1x10 - A Nerd Hope

November 8, 2006

Two boys are in a small to mid-sized SUV, being chased by a larger, longer, white limousine. One of the boys sticks an unknown CD inside a Splinter Cell case and tosses it out the window. The 2 boys make a bogus excuse like a "munchies run", but Thompson orders the car to be torn apart and munchies to be found unopened.

1x11 - The Thompson Strikes Back

December 5, 2006

A parody of Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back. Ethan, Lilah, and Lucas are at an arcade when Jack Thompson appears. Ben Kotarski appears in a ghostly blue form, telling Ethan he needs to go to the Play-All-Night LAN Center. Ethan takes no more than one step before he collapses, shivering and unable to move further.

1x12 - Return of the Gamer

January 19, 2007

A parody of Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi; Ethan and Lilah attempt to rescue Lucas, who is on trial before a "joo-rey" (jury) presided over by Bubba the Judge (who resembles Jabba the Hutt). Ethan uses his Nintendo Knight skills with a Nintendo Wii controller to defeat Bubba and the Bounty Lawyer and free Lucas. The plan is to attack a nearby telephone pole, which will destroy the Second Billboard when it falls down.

Dave B. Mitchell

Barry

Patrick Cavanaugh

Ethan

Lara Cody

Lilah