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Somebody Has to Play Cleopatra
The Dick Van Dyke Show - S2 - E14
Rob recalls directing last year’s PTA variety show, when jealousy interfered as he tried to pair the perfect Cleopatra with an amorous Mark Antony.
The Dick Van Dyke Show: Season 2 - 32 Episode s
2x1 - Never Name a Duck
September 26, 1962
Rob brings home two baby ducks left over from the show, and Ritchie becomes attached to them. When one dies and the other becomes ill, Rob must convince him that wild animals are happier when left in the wild.
2x2 - The Two Faces of Rob
October 3, 1962
Rob tries to prove he can use a fake accent to fool Laura into flirting with a stranger, then is dismayed to think that he really has.
2x3 - The Attempted Marriage
October 10, 1962
Rob and Laura tell Ritchie the story of their failed attempts to get married.
2x4 - Bank Book 6565696
October 17, 1962
When Rob discovers Laura’s secret bank, he thinks he is getting a new projector for his birthday—but instead he receives a sports shirt, and begins to wonder what that money is really for.
2x5 - Hustling the Hustler
October 24, 1962
Rob invites Buddy’s brother Blackie for a friendly game of pool, not realizing that he is a hustler.
2x6 - My Husband Is Not a Drunk
October 31, 1962
Rob accidentally intercepts a hypnotic suggestion meant for Buddy, and doesn’t realize that every time he hears a bell ring, he starts acting like a roaring drunk.
2x7 - What's in a Middle Name?
November 7, 1962
Ritchie wonders what the ""R"" in his middle name stands for (Rose Bud) Rob and Laura figure out how to explain how he got Rose Bud for a middle name, it started when Laura tells Rob she is going to have a baby. Ritchie learns he has 7 middle names! (which spell out Rose Bud)
2x8 - Like a Sister
November 14, 1962
Rob thinks Rick Vallone isn't right for Sally and tries to make him drunk (Sally hates drunks) and asks Rick to fall in love with Laura. Laura is always to smart for Rob and he realizes love is too hard to break.
2x9 - The Night the Roof Fell In
November 21, 1962
Rob comes home mad because the script needed a rewrite, Buddy was late & Sally left early. Rob leaves mad and goes for a walk. Laura wants a chance to talk to somebody so Millie listens not quite sure what they fought about.
2x10 - The Secret Life of Buddy and Sally
November 28, 1962
Rob worries that Buddy & Sally aren't his friends & falling in love with each other. Rob calls Buddy at home and Pickles and thinks Buddy picked up the phone. Now Rob has proof (or so he thinks) that Buddy are working on another show. They are doing a nightclub act on the side.
2x11 - A Bird in the Head Hurts
December 5, 1962
Ritchie claims he is being attacked by a giant woodpecker, but Rob and Laura are convinced it’s just a bid for attention.
2x12 - Gesundheit, Darling
December 12, 1962
Rob, Laura, Jerry & Millie are playing cards, when Jerry thinks Rob might be sneezing because he keeps losing a game. Rob thinks he could be allergic to Laura. Rob goes to the doctor to find out he could be allergic to his wife!
2x13 - A Man's Teeth Are Not His Own
December 19, 1962
Rob bites some chicken and breaks a tooth but feels bad when another dentist fixes the tooth. He worries that Jerry won't be his friend. Rob tries not to show his teeth. Jerry isn't mad at Rob.
2x14 - Somebody Has to Play Cleopatra
December 26, 1962
Rob recalls directing last year’s PTA variety show, when jealousy interfered as he tried to pair the perfect Cleopatra with an amorous Mark Antony.
2x15 - The Cat Burglar
January 2, 1963
Rob & Laura read about a cat burglar and wants his picture in the paper. A noise is heard & Rob takes the gun but can't find the bullets! Laura puts them in her Jewelry box!
2x16 - The Foul Weather Girl
January 9, 1963
Laura has a problem when a girl asks for help in lading a role on the show. Laura's problems get worse as Janie tells Laura how far they go back in high school and she is single. Laura gets mad when Rob works nights with Janie, She begins to thank Mel and not Rob.
2x17 - Will You Two Be My Wife?
January 16, 1963
Buddy and Sally find Rob’s manuscript, which tells the story of the time he had to choose how to spend a three-day leave from the Army: go on a honeymoon with Laura, or travel back to Danville to tell his former fiancée Dorothy that he was marrying someone else.
2x18 - Ray Murdock's X-Ray
January 23, 1963
Rob goes on an interview show, where he is tricked into describing Laura as a nut.
2x19 - I Was a Teenage Head Writer
January 30, 1963
Rob recalls the day he became head writer of the Alan Brady Show, and his first day of work with Buddy and Sally.
2x20 - It May Look Like a Walnut!
February 6, 1963
In this classic, Rob has a dream - inspired by a late-night horror movie on TV - involving walnuts, missing thumbs, and a creature named Kolac.
2x21 - My Husband Is a Check-Grabber
February 13, 1963
Rob wonders why Laura is angry with him, and learns she objects to his habit of picking up checks when they go out with their friends.
2x22 - Don't Trip Over That Mountain
February 20, 1963
Laura is convinced that Rob will hurt himself on a ski trip, and when he actually does, Rob tries to hide his injuries rather than admit she was right.
2x23 - Give Me Your Walls!
February 27, 1963
Rob and Laura hire a painter who seems to want to do anything but paint their walls.
2x24 - The Sam Pomerantz Scandals
March 6, 1963
Buddy and Sally are asked by Rob to help in a show for a friend of Rob's - Danny Brewster.
2x25 - The Square Triangle
March 20, 1963
This week’s guest star on the Alan Brady Show turns out to be someone from Rob and Laura’s past—and they both have a reason to avoid him.
2x26 - I'm No Henry Walden!
March 27, 1963
Rob gets to meet Henry Walden at literary party but feels uncomfortable when he learns that he is the only comedy writer. The Hotels can't get their names right!
2x27 - Racy Tracy Rattigan
April 3, 1963
Alan Brady is out of town so Tracy Rattigan is the host. Rob is going to have to fight to keep Laura. Rob doesn't like how fast things are going. Tracy loves driving Rob crazy, The gang writes the best show for Tracy.
2x28 - Divorce
April 10, 1963
Rob gets in the middle of a marital dispute between Buddy and Pickles.
2x29 - It's a Shame She Married Me
April 17, 1963
Rob meets Jim Darling who is an old flame Laura dated. Rob won't tell Laura he ran into Jim at the office, Rob tells Jim they can't make it to his party because Ritchie is sick. Jim then brings the party to the Petrie home. Rob wants Laura to wear a jacket so Jim won't fall in love with her again.
2x30 - A Surprise Surprise Is a Surprise
April 24, 1963
Rob nearly ruins his own surprise birthday party after Laura finds out Rob already knows! Laura stays up all night planning the party. The guests are hiding in the Petrie house!
2x31 - Jilting the Jilter
May 1, 1963
Sally gets engaged to Freddy White, a shady comedian who just wants her to write his act.
2x32 - When a Bowling Pin Talks, Listen
May 8, 1963
Ritchie gives Rob an idea for a comedy sketch, but Rob doesn’t know he saw it on The Uncle Spunky Show.