Bilko's Perfect Day
The Phil Silvers Show - S2 - E33
For once everything goes right for Bilko, from hot showers in the morning, to picking all the winners in a horse race, but by the time he realizes it the day is over.
The Phil Silvers Show: Season 2 - 36 Episode s
2x1 - Platoon in the Movies
September 18, 1956
The platoon is chosen to make a film about the correct use of the spark plug.
2x2 - It's For The Birds
September 25, 1956
Bilko looks around for an expert to go on the 64,000 Dollar quiz show on TV. He ends up with Pvt Honnegar who is an expert on wildlife, After surviving a loss of memory he wins the money but he has a surprise in store for Bilko
2x3 - Bilko Goes To College
October 2, 1956
When a local gangster insults the army Bilko takes a bet of 1000 -1 That the local College Schmill can beat Notra Dame in a football game. Nobody gives them a chance, but when Bilko gets to work on the press they start to believe that Schmill can win.
2x4 - The Girl From Italy
October 9, 1956
Rocco's brother refuses to marry a girl brought over from Italy so Bilko sets out to make him jealous and to change his mind
2x5 - The Face On The Recruiting Poster
October 16, 1956
Bilko hopes to get a handsome young recruit noticed by Hollywood so he tries to get the soldier's face on the new army recruiting poster. But first he must pass a test on the army and with Doberman coaching him a surprise is in store.
2x6 - Bilko's War Against Culture
October 23, 1956
When two special service officers come to educate the platoon the men promise Bilko they will not attend the lectures until they see who attractive the ladies are
2x7 - The Song Of The Motor Pool
October 30, 1956
Bilko looks for a song that the motor pool can adopt. He hears Paparelli singing one in the shower but it turns out that someone thought of it first
2x8 - Bilko's Engagement
November 6, 1956
After a mix up at the jewelers Bilko finds that Joan has been given an engagement ring and she thinks that they are to married. Bilko has to think fast of a way out.
2x9 - A Mess Sergeant Can't Win
November 13, 1956
Fed up with losing to Bilko all the time Mess Sgt Ritzik is leaving the army having saved up to open a snack bar So Bilko devises a plan to repay all the money that he has won off Ritzik.
2x10 - Doberman's Sister
November 20, 1956
It's family day at Fort Baxter and all the platoon have invited their sister's. They all have date's except Doberman's so Bilko sets out to con Zimmerman into taking her out.
2x11 - Where There's A Will
November 27, 1956
A member of the platoon is cheated out of his share in his uncles will. The only thing he gets is a parrot so Bilko starts a rumor that the parrot holds the clue to a hidden treasure map.
2x12 - Bilko's Tax Trouble
December 4, 1956
Through an error Bilko is called before the tax people to explain his earnings
2x13 - Mink Incorporated
December 11, 1956
After Bilko loses 100 dollars of the platoons welfare fund on a horse, he tries to get the money back, by starting a mink farm, but the mink's refuse to breed.
2x14 - Sergeant Bilko Presents Ed Sullivan
December 18, 1956
When TV host Ed Sullivan tries to put on ‘A Salute to the Army' show, the talent scout leaves Bilko out to start with, but when the producer decides to use a jeep in the finale, they turn Bilko to organise things, but he tries to change the show to suit himself.
2x15 - Bilko Gets Some Sleep
December 25, 1956
Unable to sleep Bilko goes to the camp psychiatrist for advice. He is told to give up gambling and women.
2x16 - The Blue Blood Of The Bilko's
January 8, 1957
A sergeant from Fort Baxter is to be excluded from his son's wedding to an heiress. They only want officers to attend so Bilko decides to change their minds
2x17 - Love That Guardhouse
January 15, 1957
After winning 1500 dollars in Las Vegas, Ritzik is desperate to play poker with Bilko, so the Colonel locks him up in the guardhouse for his own protection.
2x18 - Sergeant Bilko Presents Bing Crosby
January 22, 1957
Bilko promotes a show starring Bing Crosby, but when Bing suddenly fails to show up, Bilko has to find a lookalike as a replacement.
2x19 - Bilko Goes To Monte Carlo
January 29, 1957
Bilko comes up with a foolproof method of winning at roulette, so all the camp come up with a bankroll and send him off Monte Carlo to try it out.
2x20 - Bilko Enters Politics
February 5, 1957
When the plan for a new serviceman's center is turned down by the mayor Bilko gets Doberman to run for Mayor. When it looks like Doberman will win, the campaign manager makes a deal with Bilko to build the center if Doberman will drop out
2x21 - Bilko's Television Idea
February 12, 1957
When T.V. star Buddy Bickford come to Fort Baxter to research background for a new television show. Bilko tries to sell him a T.V. idea of his own.
2x22 - The Son Of Bilko
February 26, 1957
A young practical joker joins the platoon and drives everybody crazy until Bilko finds a way to give give him a taste of his own medicine.
2x23 - Rock 'n' Roll Rookie
March 5, 1957
When singer Elvin Pelvin joins the platoon, Bilko sees a way to make money but he can't get him to sing.
2x24 - Bilko's Black Magic
March 19, 1957
When Pvt Mendleson who has been lost in the jungle for years receives in back pay he loses it to Grover and Ritzik in a poker game. Bilko uses their fear of black magic to get his money back.
2x25 - Bilko Goes South
March 26, 1957
During a cold spell the platoon think that they are entering a singing contest which will be held in Florida, but instead they take part in a dangerous medical experiment.
2x26 - Bilko Goes Around The World
April 2, 1957
After watching ' Around the World in 80 Days ' Bilko calls the producer Mike Todd and suggests that to publicize the film he offer a prize to the first person who can do the same.
2x27 - The Mess Hall Mess
April 9, 1957
Bilko has dinner at a French restaurant and finds an old recipe that will win a prize in a competition to find a brand new American recipe.
2x28 - The Secret Life Of Sergeant Bilko
April 16, 1957
An investigative reporter tries to find evidence that American soldiers are giving away defense secrets. Bilko gets to hear and helps the reporter out
2x29 - Radio Station B.I.L.K.O.
April 23, 1957
When the local radio station is to close down Bilko sees a good way to make money using army equipment
2x30 - Bilko the Marriage Broker
April 30, 1957
When Lt Wallace gets transferred to become Bilko's platoon officer he works them hard all day. So they try and get him to fall for a new WAC officer Lt Rogers but he doesn't seem to be interested but unknown to Bilko the two officers are having a secret affair and no one is to find out.
2x31 - Bilko Acres
May 7, 1957
When Bilko thinks that the camp is being enlarged he buys swamp land next door hoping to make a killing only to find that the camp is being slimmed down. Trying to recoup his money he tries to sell it as building land but first he has to kill all the mosquitoes in the swamp and he gives the job to Doberman with unfortunate repercussions
2x32 - The Big Scandal
May 14, 1957
Bilko tries to hypnotize Ritzik, but it's Doberman who falls under the influence and he tells the Colonel's wife that he loves her
2x33 - Bilko's Perfect Day
May 21, 1957
For once everything goes right for Bilko, from hot showers in the morning, to picking all the winners in a horse race, but by the time he realizes it the day is over.
2x34 - The Colonel Breaks Par
May 28, 1957
Bilko wants the Colonel away from the camp so he can operate without obstruction he decides to get the Colonel to enter a golf tournament in Palm Springs but the Colonel doesn't think he is good enough to play. So Bilko gets Sam Snead to act as a golf novice and for Bilko to give him some golf lessons while the Colonel is watching.
2x35 - Show Segments
June 4, 1957
2x36 - His Highness Doberman
June 11, 1957
Doberman is dating the daughter of a Roseville millionaire, but when her parents find out that he is just another soldier they refuse permission for them to marry.